Coaching for a Difficult HR Conversation

I am a volunteer board co-chair preparing for a difficult conversation with our Executive Director regarding performance feedback and evaluation processes. I'd like recommendations from a seasoned HR professional on how best to frame and structure this discussion.

Background:
Our board provided performance feedback to our ED in the form of a draft work plan based on staff survey results. The ED has responded with significant concerns about the process, timing (feedback was gathered during her emergency family leave), methodology, and board scope. She has raised questions about potential liability and requested formal evaluation protocols, board development coaching, and access to neutral HR representation.

We have a call scheduled with her and need guidance on how to navigate this conversation appropriately and how to proceed in a way that protects both the organization and the ED while maintaining appropriate governance oversight.
During this call, I'd like to address the following questions:

- What type of documentation should we have in place before and after the conversation?
- Should we include a third party in the conversation (e.g., another EC member, neutral facilitator)?
- What specific verbiage should we avoid, particularly given her concerns about the timing during family leave and potential liability?
- Are there compliance considerations we should keep in mind, especially regarding conducting performance-related surveys during protected leave?
- What is appropriate board scope when providing ED feedback, and how do we establish proper ED evaluation protocols going forward?
- How do we acknowledge valid process concerns while maintaining our governance responsibility to address performance issues?
- What are next steps for establishing a formal, legally sound ED evaluation process?